Friday, May 9, 2014

Movie Review: The Counselor

Movie: The Counselor (2013)
Director: Ridley Scott
Writer: Cormac McCarthy
Cast: Michael Fassbender, Cameron Diaz, Javier Bardem, Brad Pitt, Penelope Cruz, & Rosie Perez
One-Line Plot Synopsis: A lawyer (Fassbender) decides to try and make a one-and-done drug trafficking deal.

It can't be that Cormac McCarthy's novels are unfilmable because I saw what the Coen Brothers did with No Country For Old Men.  It may be that NCFOM may be the exception.  I read The Road and I'm sorry, but it was terrible.  I don't care if it was on Oprah's Best Of list.  That book was somehow boring for being such a short read.  And for one reason or another, it was missing tons of punctuation.  I'm not sure if that's McCarthy's style of writing since I haven't read any of his other works, but if it is, just know that I'm going to be steering clear.

This cast is littered with some of my favorite actors and yet there's one who's able to pull this movie down into the depths of hell...the one and only Cameron Diaz.  She hasn't made a decent movie in about 10 years, so I don't know what I was really expecting out of her here.  I think I was hoping that she'd have a small part and that the caliber of actors around her would either elevate her performance or just overshadow her. 

Unfortunately, she was probably the second lead in this movie and basically ruined it.  The dialogue is very unique in its style and she spits it out like a malfunctioning robot.  It seems so unattached and emotionless in every single thing that she's saying as if she's reading it off of cue cards.  It's literally unbearable.  

I actually don't think that this movie would have worked even with someone else in place of Diaz because it was just boring as shit across the board, but she certainly didn't help things.  The scenes with Brad Pitt and Fassbender were the best of the film but every time the ended one, the next scene would bring that momentum crashing back down to earth.

Bardem is kind of fun as an eccentric drug dealer and Penelope Cruz is as sexy and becoming as ever but neither of their characters really have enough going on with them to keep your interest for that long.

P.S. I was really annoyed with how everyone called Fassbender "Counselor" instead of by an actual name.

P.P.S. That car scene on the golf course though...

Rating: 4.5/10